« The Sovereign God | Main | Jonah »
May 01, 2005
Letters to Kay
It has been quite some time since I've posted and I'm sorry for that. I received an email from my good friend Kay today, and among other things she said I beat myself up at times unnecessarily. Below is my reply to her. I would love feedback on your struggle with the topic.
1 Cort 9:24-27 is where I find myself. You may be right that I beat myself up unnecessarily. I, for sure, am too lenient on myself at times. Maybe I go overboard in the other direction to make up.. I'm not sure it is possible to get it right all the time. God has given us amazing grace and liberty. I find I take advantage in a presumptuous way at times. I don't like that. I know He is mindful that we are but dust, but I don't want to be a user or proponent of what Dietrich Bonhoeffer called cheap grace.
It cost Him, His Son, it wasn't cheap. That said, He calls us to a life of joy that I fear too few of us enjoy, and a life of obedience too few of us walk. Maybe it is in the struggle to find balance that we find Him. I hope so.
Posted by Dennis at May 1, 2005 04:23 PM
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Comments
I understand the struggle well Dad, while I strive to be obedient I also try to stay guarded about thinking God needs my obidience, like some how he needs my help rather than me the beggar needing all from Him.
I find great comfort in Hebrews chapter 12.
Obedience is for my benefit not His.
Posted by: David L at May 2, 2005 02:19 AM
I once had a similar conversation with our mutual friend, Cal. His answer to me (in a nutshell) was that if we were wondering and agonizing about our place in the race...we really had little to worry about for our eye was still on the prize. For it is those who think that the race is already over and that they have won; they should be worried, as the prize is yet to be won.
Remember when you were young and you would sometimes run...just to be running! Remember the joy of that, the feeling of the wind and the warmth of the sun. You have no competitors in this race, so enjoy the running.
Posted by: Steven at May 2, 2005 05:04 AM
Excellent Steve, You put it so well.
Posted by: David L at May 2, 2005 05:24 PM
I agree. I do the same thing. However, sometimes I feel so unworthy, so undeserving of His grace, so afraid to take "advantage of His grace and liberty" that I quit trying. And then that becomes a stumbling block in my relationship with Him. I believe He wants us to be bold in our dealings with Him. I can never truly deserve His grace, that's why Christ had to come. I want to be mindful of the cost, but at the same time, I don't want the fear of failure to stop me from trying and boldly coming before Him and accepting His unending grace and forgivness for me. You shouldn't beat yourself up...Christ bore those lashes already for us. We just need to recommit daily to becoming more and more like Christ and His Holy Spirit will accomplish that work in us.
Posted by: Becky at May 10, 2005 11:46 AM